Monday, May 7, 2007
The Bachelor in Sugar Land, TX
Woah. Woah. Woah.
Fancied friends, I am about to admit to you a little secret that Seth and I share. But it must be revealed so I can share this very weird but exciting circumstance with you.
As of this year, Seth and I now watch.....The Bachelor.
I know, I know. I slap myself every time, but it comes on after Dancing with the Stars, and you know I can't possibly miss THAT. So what do I do when, while glued to the couch dialing the number for my favorite dancing star, The Bachelor shows me scenes from last week's episode. I can't just turn it off! No, no, this stuff is too juicy. It's too catty and ridiculous. I'm watching a sorority house gone utterly maniacal. Girls, girls, girls, crying girls, conniving girls, back-stabbing and malicious girls. And one officer and a gentleman: Andy.
Andy's actually pretty alright. A good guy. Of course, when you consider that he's dating 15, then 8, then 4, now 3 girls at a time, you have to wonder how gentleman-like the guy can be. But, hey, really, and I mean this. He seems like a very sincere guy who took a step of faith to find the woman of his dreams.
So in tonight's episode, Andy goes to each of the 4 girls' hometowns to meet their families. Talk about intense. These girls are all in love with Andy! And all crying about how they're in love with Andy. And then....me! I'm crying! Why am I crying!?!? Because these girls are introducing Andy to their dads, and then one is crying to her dad about how she doesn't want to get hurt, and then HER DAD is crying! Geesh. Reality television, how did we get here? Their pain is my entertainment.
Anyway, that's not my point.
The point is, that as I'm sure you know, one of these 4 girls, Amber, is from Sugar Land, TX. So we're watching, and....Hey! That's the restaurant by our apartment! And then, they're on a playground in a park....and then! They're leaving Amber's apartment, and I say. Seth! That's our apartment complex! The Bachelor was at our apartment complex! Oh my gosh! Wait, lemme check the doors and see if they match up. I run outside and look at our door. Exactly the same, except the number, of course.
Amber lives in my apartment complex!
You should know Amber did not get a rose tonight. She went home, devastated and alone. Poor Amber. Maybe I'll see her soon in my park, and we can have lunch, and we can talk about her roommate and her aunt and her love life. Then maybe I'll tell her that I'm sorry her parents weren't there to meet Andy, just because they didn't agree with Amber being on the show. What a shame. Then maybe I'll tell her how sorry I am that her pain was my entertainment. But then maybe I'll remind her that she signed up to be my entertainment, and ask her why she would do that.